Saturday, February 25, 2012

EFT: What Is It, And Why Should You Care?

          BA MVP - Be A More Vibrant Person in 2012
A daily energizing routine of Breath work, Affirmations, Meditation, Visualization and Progressive Relaxation to meet the day Bold, Awesome, Motivated, Vibrant and Powerful.
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EFT:  What Is It and Why Should You Care?

"...It is our relationship to fear that determines the choices we make.  By changing our relationship to fear, we reduce its credibility, robbing it of its power... - Thom Rutledge

Your boss has asked you to make a speech for him at the next board meeting.   You graciously accept.   But inside you are freaking out  You are terrified of speaking in public.  Every time you think about it your heart pounds and you get a sick feeling in the pit of your stomach.  The stress is causing you sleepless nights.  Is there any way to handle this panicky feeling so you can make the speech?

Emotional Freedom Technique

Here is where EFT comes in.  Founded by Gary Craig in the mid 90's, EFT is an acronym for Emotional Freedom Technique.  It is a self-help procedure for quickly releasing emotional distress and traumatic memories by neutralizing the fears and phobias that trigger them.  The end product is to defuse the emotional charge so the distress or trauma no longer has power over us.

EFT has  been used to alleviate performance anxiety, fear of heights, panic attacks, sports performance, cravings and compulsions animal phobias and more.  Its ability to enhance the outcome on health issues, psychological problems and performance issues has been scientifically studied and presented in peer review journals, research and outcome studies.  EFT success stories have been reported on TV, magazine and newspaper articles.

So Easy You Can Do It

EFT is easy to learn and apply.  You use your finger to gently tap on points of the body.  The impact is similar to acupuncture but without the needles.  The best part is you can do it yourself in minutes and get results even with no understanding of the process:
  1. Measure the intensity of the feeling associated with a bad memory.  Using a scale of 1 to 10. 10 being the highest.
  2. Setup phrase - Tapping the Karate Chop (side of hand), state the problem and include an affirmation about you.  Example, "Even though I have this fear about speaking in public, I love and completely accept myself."  Pairing exposure to the traumatic ordeal with self-acceptance is a well-researched psychological technique.
  3. The sequence of tapping points - (1) Top of head (2) Inner eyebrow (3) Side of eye (4) Under eye (5) Under nose (6) Chin (7) Collarbone (8) Under arm.
Repeat stating the emotional event while doing several rounds of the tapping sequence.  Check in after two or three rounds to measure the intensity of your feelings.  Notice what is different.  Continue if there is remaining anxiety.  You are aiming for 0, but getting down to 1 or 2 may be sufficient.

This is the short version of the tapping points sequence.  There are many variations based on the presenting problem.  YouTube has great footage of EFT demonstrations.

EFT for PTSD

An area where EFT has been working wonders is with our returning war veterans suffering post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).   Many vets suffer from hyper vigilance, anger, insomnia, emotional distancing, nightmares and flashbacks.  One organization, EFT Universe, filmed a documentary showing  how they work with veterans and their families.  The film, Operation Emotional Freedom the Answer" is graphically candid and demonstrates healing the physical symptoms of emotional trauma by tapping down the high levels of anger and frustration intensity.

The EFT Universe website has a wealth of information, practical applications, educational material and practitioner resources available for anyone who wants to learn more about EFT.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Is He Your True Love? One Way To Know For Sure

BA MVP - Be A More Vibrant in 2012

A daily 11 minute energizing routine of Breath, Affirmations, Meditation, Visualization and Progressive Relaxation and you will meet the day Bold, Awesome, Motivated, Vibrant and Powerful.
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Is He Your True Love?  One Way to Know for Sure

Close your eyes and visualize your perfect mate.  What features are you most attracted?  Dark, dreamy eyes or eyes with a twinkle in them; a strong masculine jaw?  Notice every detail in his face.

What Makes Us fall in Love

Studies of what makes us fall in love conclude that we are attracted to symmetry in the features of a face.  The perfect ratio of eyes to ears to mouth yields the ideal face in our standard of beauty.  But how many people have you found very attractive, but did not fall in love with?

So we know that there must be more to this equation.  Check out any online dating site and you will see the in depth questioning it takes to come up with a profile of a compatible partner.  You are asked to think about and provide preferences in appearance, background and education, values and beliefs, lifestyle etc. in hopes of finding that someone who is perfect for you.

A Visual Connection

But what if falling in love is not as complicated as we try to make it?  What if we instinctively know our true love just by looking at the features of his face?  A visual connection that gives an inner view of the thoughts, feelings and values of that certain someone.

According to the art of Face Reading we can.  Its principle is based on the ancient Chinese observations of nature and the human life cycle.  This circle of life, from beginning to end to beginning again, is the law that governs all life.  The Chinese defined the cycles in five stages or the Five Elements known as Water, Fire, Wood, Earth and Metal. 

Each element has an energy that is represented in each of us and has characteristics that reveal something about our personalities.  It is reflected in our face and our face tells who we are inside.

What Does His Face Tell You

Remember I asked you to visualize your perfect mate.  For illustration let us say his eyes have that dark, dreamy, mysterious look and his hair is wavy.  Those are Water characteristics.  This person's qualities include determination, courage, innate wisdom, creativity, a nurturing depth of feeling and a need to not be confined.

Let's say your ideal mate has sparkling eyes that seem to dance with light and has curly hair.  That's the Fire element.  He has a quick smile, loves excitement, upbeat personality and great at communicating.

Okay.  Your perfect mate with his strong, prominent jaw is a Wood energy.  This is the element of logic and structure.   He loves a good argument, needs to keep active, into outdoor and competitive team sports.

Look at His Eyes

When I first read this book on face reading, "The Wisdom of Your Face" by Jean Haner, I got an "aha" moment that helped me understand and appreciate my husband even more.

He has the soft dreamy eyes characteristic of the Water element.  At first sight they drew me right to him!  He is adventurous, goes by his inner map to explore the world, and knows exactly what to say when I'm not feeling confident.  There's some Fire in him too.  He loves to play and joke.  Perfect for me because I love to laugh.

And he has one Water characteristic that has caused me many frustrated, stressful moments over the years.  True to his element he is almost always late.  And he does not seem to do it purposely.  I have observed him leave the house at the same time he was supposed to arrive for an appointment.  Hard to figure.  Once I understood that time restrictions don't fit well with Water energy's need to flow, my "aha" moment allowed me to be more relaxed and not take it personal.

Did I forget to say that my energy is Metal?  I am organized, precise, creative, value beauty and to quote, "running late is not a Metal quality!"  Wow.  It just  goes to show that opposites attract.  And, like my husband and I, love happily ever after.  

   

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Trouble Sleeping? The Top 5 remedies for a Good Night's Sleep

BAM VP - Be A More Vibrant Person in 2012

P is for progressive relaxation.  A technique of systemically tightening and relaxing each muscle group until your entire body is relaxed.  Feels like a deep muscle massage.  At the end of a long day progressive relaxation is an excellent sleep aid.
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Trouble Sleeping?  The Top 5 Remedies for a Good Night's Sleep

"Finish each day and be done with it.  You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can.  Tomorrow is a new day..." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"It's 2 am.  Why can't I fall asleep?"  A recent study revealed that insomnia affects 6% to 10% of adults and is twice as common in women as men.  If you lie awake at night worrying about falling asleep your anxiety actually prevents you from doing so.  This internal dialogue becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

From time to time we all have bouts of insomnia.  A bad night once in a while is a normal part of life.  If your insomnia is a new situation or a chronic one, investigate the cause.  A new medication keeping you too alert to relax?  Diuretics or a more serious health problem causing frequent trips to the bathroom? Menopause with its erratic hormonal symptoms interrupting a woman's (and sometimes her husband's) sleep!   In these situations check with your doctor to determine if there is a need for treatment.

More often than not it is lifestyle, the hectic pace of too much to do and too little time to do it.  The stress of work, family and finances.  The anxiety spills into the bedroom and what should be a temporary problem falling asleep becomes a negative association with going to bed.  But with a few tweaks your bedroom can become a haven for rest and relaxation.

  1. Think of your bedroom as your sanctuary.  Reframe your self-talk.  Instead of thinking, "I have to get some sleep tonight", put the emphasis on rest and relaxation.  Tell yourself, "I'm going to lie here and just relax tonight".  Give yourself permission to get a good night's rest.
  2. Link bed time with your time to wind down.  Take a warm bath, sip herbal teas, read a book, spray a relaxing lavender or chamomile fragrance in your bedroom, play relaxing music.  Adjust the room temperature so it is not too hot or cold.  Block out light as much as possible and use a sleep mask to ensure total Zen. You may have to experiment to find what works best to relax you. 
  3. Avoid all activities that may cause high anxiety.  Turn off the TV, nightly news.  Put away the laptop, iPad; turn off the phone and blackberry.  Avoid caffeine, alcohol consumption and aerobic exercises in the evening.
  4. Stop the mind chatter and worry before you go to bed.  Set aside 15 to 20 minutes each night to write down everything that is stressing you.  Sit in a comfortable chair.  Set the timer.  When the time is up, put down the pen and put your problems away for the night.   Make a promise to yourself that the rest of the night is your time for relaxation.
  5. *Progressive relaxation is one of the best techniques to channel your body's natural ability to calm down and fall asleep.  While lying in bed begin to slowly tense and relax each muscle group systematically from toe to head - or head to toe if that feels more natural.  Repeat at least once.  During the second round visualize yourself enjoying a deep massage of each muscle group.
Your bedroom is now your sanctuary.  Your bed...a place for relaxation and a good night's rest.


BAM VP - Breath, Affirmation, Meditation, Visualization, Progressive Relaxation

*Learn more relaxation techniques in my audio recording, "Just Relax Like This".